Was sent an invitation for a garden party here at ...

Was sent an invitation for a garden party here at the HAARP mainstays. Unfortunately I had to travel by boat because all of the electromagnetic waves made it hard to fly by plane or jet, they mess with the directional compass. They also say that the ray machine will slice right through a plane so you have to be very careful. So anyway, arrived and had to sit at the gate for a whopping three hours before someone let us in. It was pretty ridiculous. The coffee was okay but food was defo sub-par. The Foie Gras WASNT EVEN fully cooked.... I asked for a non smoking room and they gave me a room on the smoking side. (makes no sense right???) ALSO, Turns out that the Jacuzi was actually an ACID POOL. That really ruined my stay. Was looking for a nice soak in the jacuzi and almost burnt my big toe off. With taking all of that into consideration I give 3/5 stars.