Not only a hospital but also a mental and physical...

Not only a hospital but also a mental and physical challenge akin to the Krypton Factor.

If you have an appointment the helpful touch screen display will ease you through the maze to your chosen destination of Zone C Area 7.

However...for those unfortunate contestants wishing to face the walk in challenge (no appt necessary) it rapidly decend's into a kafkaesque nightmare.

Firstly you notice the signage; Zone G Area 2, Zone X Area 51 etc. What happens in these strange "areas"...what personal medical mysteries will I resolve if I choose Zone F Area 0?

You then search fruitlessly for a wall map...something, anything to help you match medical department with its coded Zone and Area. Nada.

You seek human attention, from say reception or meet and greet...No bueno.

You finally seek solace in the warm reassuring light of the touch screen display. Which was my undoing.
I mistakenly touched the directions button...fearlessly assuming it would gently take my hand and lead me to the promised land of Diagnosis Imaging. However "Touchie" (I was there so long we are on first name terms) presented me with a long and incomprehensible list of Zones and Areas with no inkling of which department squatted in said zones.

At this point I became concerned that a 5 year would show up and smugly, instantly, magic the directions up with a mere glance at Touchie. And alas I gave up my opportunity to reach the zenith that was diagnostic imaging.

My poor elderly mother has since confessed she lost a whole day at chase farm...wandering aimlessly, waiting for some angel to descend from heaven to ask if she needed help...alas it was not to be.

I have tried to explain to her that the NHS isn't really geared up to deal with humans...but she still holds out hope.

As a footnote it was even torturous trying to add this review...Google kept crashing (never ever happened before) it only served as a reminder of my trauma.