X. Blake Sparrow

Review of Savage River Lodge

In short, the value is just not here: $330 per nig...

In short, the value is just not here: $330 per night for a basic cabin. It s not luxurious; it really is just a cabin. It kind of felt like a Holiday Inn Express, except I was paying $250 too much.

First, the good things. It s in the woods. If you like remote, it s a good start.

Second, the sheets are soft. I like nice sheets.

Third, I had alerted them to the fact that this was our 10th year wedding anniversary. They left a nice half bottle of champagne.

Everything else was a disappointment. I m going the issues as we encountered them.

First, we were not greeted upon entry. There was a very loud group of six women in front of us in line, but the receptionist did not acknowledge that we came in, and although there appeared to be someone else in the back, that person did not come out to help us. When we did check in, the receptionist was not particularly warm; she was fairly cold, and I signed the approval slip. I asked about trails, and she was not knowledgeable about them no one I spoke to was, which is disappointing for a place that claims to have many miles of trails. I also found it strange that there were dead pots of chrysanthemums everywhere and that there were pumpkins for sale on the front porch of a luxury accommodation. It was an ominous beginning.

We went to our cabin, and the first thing that surprised us was just how close the cabins were together. They re probably about 20 feet apart, so there does not feel like there is much privacy.

The cabin was unremarkable. They had forgotten to take out our recycling, so it made me wonder what else they had forgotten. They forgot to replenish our beverages; the hot cocoa was missing. There were a series of empty baskets in the loft; was something supposed to be there? The furniture was very dated, but to be fair, it was very comfortable. The thermostat cover fell off when I tried to adjust the temperature. All in all, the place felt past its prime.

The bathroom was disappointing. For $330 per night, I don t feel like the tub should be a one-piece plastic prefab shell. Also, the toilet was a plastic toilet; it had the urinal cutout in the middle of the seat, and it made me feel like I was at work. The tub had a bug in it, which I get because we are in the woods. The backsplash for the sink was being pulled from the wall and hadn t been fixed. The bathroom vanity had plain, exposed bulbs. It was simply unimpressive it was regular like a Holiday Inn Express.

The pillows were not real pillows. We got four pillows that were the equivalent of camping pillows. This really detracted from my sleep.

The menus in the lodge were strange. Go take a look. Blueberry jam on an Eggs Benedict?

Perhaps most disappointing was the muffin basket. We received two cold muffins and juice made from concentrate. The muffin did not taste fresh; it tasted like soft sugar mush, like Sara Lee. It was of lesser quality than Costco (I loooove Costco!). I think three or four assorted muffins that did not taste undercooked would have been better than two identical, high fructose corn syrup cupcakes. Also, our cooler looked like it had been attacked by an animal. Again, it wouldn t have been an issue if we were paying $150 or $200, but $330?

Finally, most folks were pretty unfriendly. I was also surprised to get a call on the Thursday before we arrived letting me know that there was a free room on Friday for one night. I had been on the wait list, but when I looked for availability, a room was listed, and I took it. It made me think that the wait list was a farce because it was.

Ultimately, I think the difference between a great place and a regular place are the little things. This place fails at all the little things, but charges like it s a great place. I know it won an award many years ago, but I think it really is resting on its laurels, but expectations are different in what-is-soon-to-be-2020. It s not worth the cash; you d be better off at an AirBNB.