Do husbands get a choice?

Do husbands get a choice?

So three days ago, my wife and I checked into the hospital.

She was going into labor.

Lets skip to the part where she is fully dilated.

Its 6:10 am, nurses are about to turnover at 7.

We have one nurse in the room, and one delivery doctor.

My wife is due that moment, the doctor tells her to push. Then as an afterthought she pulls out the foot rests and told my wife to put her feet up. Then told her to move, then after realizing my wife was too tall for the standard foot rests, she then tries to set up the extended foot rests for taller people- all the while my wife is going through the motions and urges of pushing and telling her to push without foot supports. Oh guess what, the extended foot rests, one of them was jammed/broken. So my wife is told to push all the while this doctor wastes time trying to set things up last minute.

For alternative support, we then get the nurse to hold her left leg, I ended up holding the right leg. Was I given a choice? Nope, they were understaffed, why? Because all the other nurses wanted to go home instead of sticking around to assist in a last minute birth before the shift change. ( I could be wrong about the reason but hell this was a mess from my point of view.)

This doctor left the room for several contraction/pushes, dont know where the hell she went.

The nurse kept going to the baby monitor, she had to be told several times during pushes to go back to the left leg, all because their stupid birthing bed was broken. The nurse's job I suppose was to monitor the baby, but hello? The baby will be in distress if we cant even get it out, no? SO FREAKING GET TO THE BED, HOLD MY WIFE'S LEG AND TURN TO WATCH the screen if need be.

Two baby doctors appeared later on and they just stood there watching. I'm standing there still holding my wife's leg thinking uh.. So how about one of you come over here and help.

No their job is only the baby apparently. But one of them actually comes over to my wife and gives her breathing advice and tips that actually help my wife through the pushes. The nurse? useless, the doctor assigned? useless. Other nurses come in the room but never stayed to assist. I held my wife's leg the whole damn time. One nurse brought and dripped mineral oil into the vagina and left.

Towards the final pushes the nurse goes back to the baby monitor and my wife loses for a minute and snapped "uh could somebody hold my leg?" and I in turn said, "Yeah, can you hold her leg? I dont even know why the hell I am holding the other leg this is just ridiculous."

n the useless doctor kept going "breathe 1 2 333333333333333333333333333333" from the very first push towards the end. Yeah thats really helping doc.

It was unreal. I am shocked at how incompetent these nurses and doctors are.

I never got asked if I could assist, if I wanted to assist, I have no qualms about assisting my wife in her time of need for my baby girl. But what drives me insane is the fact how they seemed so disoriented and disorderly that my wife had to suffer longer than necessary.

Oh and the bags they set up to catch the fluids when my baby came out, good thing I jumped out of the way cause it splashed right where my foot was. Pure mess.

Post care nurses- 2 days out of 3, were great to my wife and baby except this one nurse on the second day who kept saying she'd do this and do that but disappeared for 30 minutes and then come back empty handed only to walk back out to retrieve what she said she'd bring. Whatever!!

But this review is reflective of the incompetence during birth. I am simply outraged thinking back at how it all played out.

Where was my choice? Where were your nurses?

When we get the bill, do I get a deduction for assisting your nurse? your doctor?

Don't get me wrong I would do it all over again for my wife and child, I just want to know where the hell my choice was.