4 years ago
First trip to the new embassy. Mixed bag.
First trip to the new embassy. Mixed bag.
First impression, the new building itself looks like a combination of a Church of Latter Day Saints, combined with an up-scale drug addiction clinic (in-patient), and a private middle school in suburbian Virginia. But for the iron fence around it, however, it is a much more relaxing setting than the previous intimidating black monolith near the Palace. I really liked the seperate entrance for American citizen services. Quick and effective, and no more passing passports through the fence, like family visits to the gulag. Yet, it gets a bit confusing once inside where a set of 3 identical doors that you are vaguely waved toward take on a sort of "Laugh-In" effect: "from which door will Dan Rowan pop out?"
The security guards are all Norwegian. Now, is it just me, or does this feel strange how Norwegian citizens, working in my embassy, somehow make me full vaguely guilty (and scared) for coming to renew my own birthright passport at my own embassy? I guess I just have to accept the fact that this is where we are at in this world these days outsourced and scared. That doesn't mean I don't "get it". There is a reason why the US embassy has been shunted to the unwilling outskirts of Oslo, and away from the Royal Palace, unlike the folksy embassies of smaller, less prominent (and less despised) nations of, say, Portugal (pictured below). Or even Russia. Or Israel. Anywho.
The bank-like atmosphere in the new (and a bit small? I mean, the new building is 'UGE! Makes me wonder what they need all that extra space for...) waiting room was relaxing, and nostalgic with many of the same childrens' toys having made the trip from the old embassy. Here, there is a great contrast. The people working INSIDE the embassy are generally friendly and familiar enough to put one at ease (the guard inside actually yawned and smiled and nodded when we came in, in a singular reassuring moment of Mayberry-esque down home-ness)
Yet, when we got to the last window (you have to speak to three different people at three different windows) we got a "funny guy". Though friendly-ish, he was smug and a little too unprofessionally sarcastic. And though I doubt it was solely his idea, he felt the need to ask our 11-year-old kid if the information in her current passport was correct, and if that was indeed HER picture...uh... But to top it all off, in a grandiose flourish of Trumpian histrionics and bear in mind this a routine passport RENEWAL for a child he made us all raise our right hands and swear that the info we were providing was truthful, right there in front of him, God, and everyone in the itsy-bitsy waiting room. And to tell the truth (I swear!), I don't know who felt more akward about it: him, God, us, or everyone in the itsy-bitsy waiting room. Now, I don't know about you, but if someone is already a liar and lying....oh, well. Maybe I am thinking too much. Which I am fully aware is entirely out of political fashion these days.
I will close by complaining about the fee. Not necessarily the increased cost ($150, which the also conspicuously non-American clerk who first helped us explained to me was fair, and that the Norwegian passport was waaaaay too cheap. Makes people not appreciate them--I paraphrase). It was more this kind of shell-game, deceptive, RyanAir approach to pricing. On the Embassy website, it lists the fee for passport renewal as $80. But when you get there, they tell you it cost something like $150. I asked why, and the clerk explained that it costs $80 for the book, but another $25 fee because a human has to wait on
you. Here, the US Embassy diverges from RyanAir, who at least has self-check in machines, so I can choose not to pay this fee with them. The other $45 fee was for the heavily armed security shake-down option that I don't remember clicking on when I made my reservation. So there you have it. A mixed bag of an embassy for a mixed bag of a fatherland. From "melting pot" to "mixed bag". I guess it all makes sense, somehow.