Purgatory........

Purgatory........

World's biggest car park and felt like I should have caught the number 47 bus from my car to the front door.......It must have been 500 metres away!
Upon entering the building, be on your toes and muster the animal instinct of fight or flight as the women wield shopping baskets like swords.

It's like the 9am doors open Black Friday crush at Curry's when flat TV's are being given away.

OMG......avoid this place if you have a pulse because the target audience is the blue rinse brigade.

This place is a monstrosity and is full of impolite OAP's buying over priced tat for nieces and nephews.
These are Department Store prices but presented like a jumble sale.

Anyway....back to my experience

After only a matter of moments of entering the building, my chest tightened and I realised I was overdosing on Charlie by Revlon....which seems to be the 70's perfume of choice for all the female customers. Feeling the immediate need for medical intervention, I took out my mobile phone....guess what? Zero mobile signal, so no chance of a call to the outside world to ask for a rescue.

Before collapsing, I initiated fight mode and dropped to my knees. From down here I noted that people were not walking but shuffling in a similar manner to the zombies in The Walking Dead. I eventually made it as far as the Casio watch display (for reference, this is under the escalators)
I was approached by a friendly looking chap who identified himself as the leader of the resistance.
He led me by the arm to an area that can only be described as Nirvana

Welcome to misery corner

An area of seating with many comfy foam cushioned chairs where similar men gather to find peace......and it isn't outside a female changing room or toilet.

The view from Misery corner is the shoe department and it was entertaining to watch the fairer sex buying footwear that as we know is usually a size too small but fear not as Misery Mills has an expert on hand and a vast display of silicon shoe inserts to sell the customers with Hobbit feet

I eventually felt the urge to move as my fight or flight sensation re-emerged and stealthily made my way to the exit.

It's this bad...they sell liquorice in wooden bins targeted at the poor souls queuing to pay......and the queues are long.

It's no coincidence that as you approach this building it has the look of a prison.

Don't say I didn't warn you mk