Some of the teachers are light of my life, fire of...

Some of the teachers are light of my life, fire of my loins - but not the one who has a strange obsession with romaine lettuce & a lack of understanding regarding basic door mechanics/function. That guy is the schitz. Also, when I initially saw the high school principal, my first thought was that Willem Dafoe had been in some terrible accident. And the rest is rust and stardust.