Ahhh yes, the Seattle Chicken's Theatre, a robust ...

Ahhh yes, the Seattle Chicken's Theatre, a robust symbol of discomposure that has cost me several prolonged lapses in judgement since my birth in '37. It was during this year that I gained insight into the workings of the heart, hands and respiratory system - knowledge I hesitate to forget in the near future, knowledge that carried me through my capacious work as a Chicken Surgeon at this very Chicken Theatre. The layout of the Theatre is decisively wretched - with gaggles of young chicks and chickens nipping about at their own leisure. As their impoverished, tender and querulous surgeon, it was my humble duty to equip each chick or chicken with a new respiratory system after each Theatrical performance, a position previously held only by lewd friends and unadulterated foes. Each rousing hour of my job I was tormented for days at a time, performing extensive feats of ill-will to thousands of chicks and chickens alike. Unlike other locally owned Chicken's Theatres, this one paid me several hundred dollars per decade, which was a treat for me, especially after I was diagnosed with a disorder that desolate winter, a disorder that left me with somewhere between three and sixty eight hospital bills, depending on who you ask. One chick from these years in particular stands out - Louanne, an austere, pensive girl of just 4 years, who always had a bit to say about the passage of time, the definite nature of death, and the fragile state of our ecosystem. If you are interested in seeing her perform, I suggest you complete the tragic journey to the Theatre as fast as you can, as my career is dwindling down, and chicks and chickens cannot fetter their own wishes.